‘You’re in here,’ Tequila said as he pushed open a door.
Kevin looked into the room. Small, white and bare but it had a bed and felt cool. It would do.
‘I’m next door, if you need anything during the night.’ The short guy gave him a wink but must have seen the worried look cross Kevin’s face because he added, ‘only joking. I don’t finish work tonight until two so I’ll come in quietly. Here, I’ll show you where everything is.’
The flat was small, similar to the apartment that Kevin should have been staying in. Open plan, it had probably been built at the time when the coast of Canaria had given its ancient landscape up to concrete and the promise of mass tourism. Plastered white walls and glossed white woodwork, flimsy hardboard doors and archways between kitchen and living room. The imitation marble tiles on the floor were cracked in places and Kevin sensed that soundproofing had not been a major concern to the property developers. He could hear someone’s television playing late night Spanish comedy and canned laughter.
Tequila stood leaning against the kitchen work surface, his arms and ankles folded, while Kevin gave a cursory look around the living room. Kevin was offered a can of beer as he came back into the kitchen.
‘Everything ok?’ Tequila asked as Kevin took the can.
‘Great, ta.’
‘Still wondering what’s going on?’
‘What is going on?’
‘Nothing babe, nothing to worry about. There’s a TV in that cabinet, no satellite I’m afraid so it’s all in Spanish, and there’s some more beers in the fridge. Come back to bar if you want, we’re there for a few more hours yet.’
‘Why you doing this mate?’
‘You need looking after.’
‘No I don’t.’
‘Can I ask you something?’
‘What?’
Tequila pushed himself from the work surface and crossed to the bin. He pressed the pedal, flipped the lid and dropped his empty beer can into it before turning back and looking Kevin up and down.
‘Are you one of us or one of them?’ he asked.
It took Kevin a while to work out what he meant. One of us would mean was he queer, one of them… That meant the same thing didn’t it? One of them from Tequila’s point of view would have meant straight.
‘I dunno,’ he answered. And in all honesty, at that point, he really didn’t. ‘Can’t you be half and half?’
‘You can be whatever percentage you want babe…’
‘Can’t you call me something else?’
‘Like what?’
‘Like Kevin, it’s me name.’
‘Very well Kevin if we are to be formal. And you can, if it makes you feel better, call me Tom. It’s my name.’
‘So how come they call you Tequila?’
‘Lick, swallow and bite.’
‘Oh, right…’
‘Doris named me Tequila when we first met because that was all I drank. Lick the salt, swallow the drink, bite the lemon. I was in such a state when she found me that that was all I was doing, twenty-four seven. Getting slammed on slammers.’
‘And she takes in lots of blokes like you does she?’
‘Like us you mean?’ Tequila gave him a wink. ‘As I said, it’s almost a habit. But enough, I have to get back to the bar. You remember your way across the Umbro if you want to come back?’
‘I won’t be going out.’
‘Whatever. I’ll wake you in the morning around seven, we’ve got an early start.’
‘Yeah, I was going to ask…’
‘It’s a laugh. Honest, you’ll love it.’
‘What is it?’
‘Driving, that’s all.’
‘I aint driven abroad before.’
‘Simple. Just remember to stay on the right.’ Tequila was searching his pockets, checking that he had his keys. He found them and held them up, shook them.
‘But driving what?’
Kevin followed the other guy as he went out into the living room and picked something up from the coffee table. A brochure of some sort.
‘It’s all in here,’ Tequila said passing it over. ‘Doris’ gay jeep safari. We set off from here at eight, pick up the guests and drive them up into the mountains. A swim in the reservoir, visit to the caves, lunch at a mountain restaurant, a bit of off road and back down for five. You’ll love it.’
Kevin wasn’t so sure.
‘Gay jeep safari?’ His face had turned slightly pale. ‘She wants me to drive a jeep off the road?’
‘You wanted to pay her back for the room. Tomorrow will be easy. We’ve only got ten guests, two jeeps. I’ll drive in front, you follow. Just don’t go over any cliffs. Got to run, see you in the morning.’
Read more of this story
